3 Tips for a Smooth Wedding Day
Helpful tips on how to seriously have an effortless wedding day!
As told by a Wedding Photographer
I was walking today with a friend and she was talking with me about just the general changes she’s seen in my style over the years, and growth in general and she straight up asked me, “how did this shift happen?”. My first thought a year ago if some one were to ask me that would be fuck, that’s a loaded question. Today, not so much; the answer came easy. Manifestation and Output. I started just believing I was living in the career I wanted and putting that energy out into the world. I focused on who my ideal client was for my business and put out the vibes to attract them. Outside of my passion for people, I started this business of mine because I wanted a career that my output of energy directly reflected my input of energy (and money, because we all know photographers can’t survive on exposure).
So why am I telling you this? What does my business have to do with your wedding? Aside from the obvious of the fact that I’m a wedding photographer... Your wedding and my business have 1 HUGE thing in common! The output and energy you want to feel on your wedding day is directly reflected by the output and energy you put into it. And no, let me stop any initial thoughts of you thinking I will plan everything to a T so that there i snow room for error on my wedding day. That’s not the vibe, Sis! But don’t worry, I’m going to share some tips with you that will allow you to have the most relaxed day as possible! Type A Queens - even you.
Step 1 : Think about how your day is going to start
When I pictured my own wedding morning I knew that I wanted to wake up in my own home and just have the freedom and space to do whatever I wanted. If I’m being transparent, I really wanted to wake up and play Mario Kart but a lot of my ladies I had with me are just not morning people! Don’t feel like you have to get ready at your venue if the space doesn’t feel right. Don’t feel like you need a dance downtown hotel if that’s not your style.
So what do I mean when I say think about your morning. What will you eat? Who is supposed to bring you champagne? Will there be music? What are you wearing? Who is going to clean up the space? Where will everyone put their things? Yes, there will be lots of bags. After all of that is handled, what do you wake up an do? Do you go for a walk to soak in the morning sun? Do you lounge by the pool and bask in the excitement of your day? Do you want to have a coffee with your fiancé before you start to get ready? No one is making you do anything. What do you actually want to do on your wedding morning? What do you need to start your day to get the best possible energy out of it?
Step 2: Who are the people you actually want around you all day?
This seems to be the biggest wedding stressor among a lot of my couples. As a pisces and people pleaser, I can totally understand why! Thinking about who is a part of the wedding party is something you need to think of in advance and not something that is easily changed after dresses or suits have been ordered. Here’s my tie bit of advice to this - Don’t have people in your wedding party who’s number one intention isn’t to love you. If they have anything in mind aside from throwing their good vibes at you, give them the boot. Don’t add in a soon to be sister in law if you aren’t close. Don’t feel the need to add Becky from your sorority because all your other sisters are in it. And for the love of all things enjoyable, do not add in Megan because Megan had you as one of her bridesmaids.
And guess what - If you did accidentally ask Jenifer to be in your wedding but she shit on any of your pre wedding celebrations, don't worry! Even if her dress has been ordered you can still change your mind. Pay her the $300 for the dress and write it off as a wedding investment because I will tell you right now, if you have any ill feelings about any of the people in your party it will carry all the way through toy our wedding. If you aren’t here to love the couples, then there’s the door.
Step 3 : Hire the right vendors for your wedding
Okay - so this one sort of feels like a shameless plug, but oh well! It’s my site and I’m convinced the two of you that might actually read this won’t mind my repping myself!
If you want a carefree wedding day you have to find a photographer and/or videographer that is going to match or better your energy. I will say this again. FIND PEOPLE WITH GOOD ENERGY! Do I go into every wedding expecting to be my couples biggest hype person? Heck yes! Does it mentally drain me every time because I’m secretly a closet introvert? Absolutely. Do I actually mean it though? Fuck yes!
If you have a friend bothering you - see ya! Have a guy getting out of hand - find your place good Sir. Mom won’t stop chiming in with ideas you’ve already vetoed - lets find her a new job… far away. After bartending for a million years reading people is not hard for me to do. After being a photographer for another million years, wiping that feeling of your face in post production is nearly impossible. This is why I am such a active component in making sure that you are enjoying your day. It makes my job more enjoyable! Don’t get me wrong, I’m also hella invested in your good time for your own benefit, but if I want to get you back pictures filled with good emotion, sometimes I have to step in and bring that emotion out.
Don’t hire your cousin because they are cheaper. Don’t hire Don because he has 50 years of experience because he probably hasn’t morphed with the times. Don’t put yourself through that! Hire people you like!
Are we seeing it yet? Are we seeing the pattern? Let me just be real with you. There are 3 simple steps. There isn’t one fail proof way to enjoy your day. A wedding is by no means easy to plan and no two couples are the same which means no two days will be the same. That’s why I love my job so much! But if you constantly reflect back on your decisions and can answer “YES!” to “Am I making this decision for us over other people?” then you will be totally fine and will enjoy your day. On the flip side though, if you reflect on your decisions and feel like you are only making them to make someone else happy - stop that. Stop that shit right now. To make it very clear incase you missed it the first time - if someone is influencing your wedding day and isn’t there to fill your energy cup with love, remove them. Clear the toxic. Create a safe space for you and your emotions that you and your fiancé want to feel. Stop just investing in your wedding day and start investing into your own self and energy. And I will just be over here keeping my finger crossed for you and getting rid of any shadow energy that I see heading your way.
Vendors who helped make this day so magical: Photography - Jessica Lynn Photography, LLC | Beauty - Kiersten Jacomb | Dress shop - Lovely Bride Philly | Stylist - Susan Padron | Floarls - B’s Events and Florals | Dress Designer - Sarah Seven
